Before you read this fanfic, scream as loud as you can. If someone questions you, throw curry at them and demand to see their geography homework.

Disclaimers/Claimers: Pokemon, authors ect, ect. I only own myself. And this cool cookie shaped like a tree! *holds up cookie*

Dedications: Angel*Clefairy... Tracey's Sketchbook... Dannichu... Sentretcookie... Anonymous 2003... Pikachu (author, not rodent)... my dog... this authentic banana *holds up banana*... The cast of this fic, for showing up at rehearsals... and the Joltmaster, for putting this fanfic up on the pokemon tower so you can read it! (If I've missed you out, email me and complain!)

Other titles I was going to use: When good Chikoritas go bad; Chikorita in a costume; Egg sandwich clones (random stuff rules!)

Storage instructions: Store in a cool dry place.

Best Before: When you find that place where parallel lines meet. That's where my thinking makes sense anyway.

Information: Contains 23 vital vitamins and minerals, including 20% RDA of Vitamin X. 99.9% biodegradable.

Now read the fic!
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Emerald Milotic: It was a time of darkness. There was no light. It was black. With no light at all. It was dark.

Bulbasaur: *trembles* I'm not scared.

Emerald Milotic: *flicks on torch*

Bulbasaur: ARGH!

Emerald Milotic: What are you doing here? You're ruining the dramatic effect.

Bulbasaur: Then it's not very effective.

Emerald Milotic: It was... until you came along. What are you doing here anyway?

Bulbasaur: Because of the chocolate!

Emerald Milotic: *takes chocolate from Bulbasaur* What chocolate?

Bulbasaur: *shrugs* I don't know. I don't have any chocolate because you just took it from me.

Emerald Milotic: I don't have any either.

Bulbasaur: That's your fault. *takes torch and runs off*

Emerald Milotic: *in the dark* Bulbasaur; you are really annoying me; did you know that?

Bulbasaur: How did you know I'm Bulbasaur? You can't even see me.

Emerald Milotic: Because it says so in the script.

Bulbasaur: What script? You mean I'm on TV?

Emerald Milotic: No, you're in my fanfic. What--

Bulbasaur: Hi mum! *waves*

Emerald Milotic: *falls over* Erm... WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY FANFIC ANYWAY?!

Bulbasaur: How would I know? It's your fanfic.

Emerald Milotic: Good point. Hey, it is my fanfic! *lights turn on* That's better. Hey, we're in a forest! How did we get here?

Strange voice: Our heroes find themselves in the middle of a strange forest...

Emerald Milotic: I know that, I just said so! And why are we the heroes? And if we are; why aren't I a heroine?

Strange voice: Sorry, I can't see you. My eyes are still getting used to this sudden bright light.

Emerald Milotic: WHY IS EVERYONE AGAINST ME? *turns strange voice off*

Bulbasaur: I'm not against you.

Emerald Milotic: Bulbasaur, you don't count.

Bulbasaur: I'm not Bulbasaur.

Emerald Milotic: ?

Bulbasaur: *unzips costume* I'm Chikorita!

Emerald Milotic: Whhaatt?! Where's Bulbasaur?

Chikorita: *~burp~*

Emerald Milotic: You ATE him?

Chickorita: I was hungry. Anyway, you'd better find some more characters or this will just be a two-man show.

Emerald Milotic: Where are we going to find more characters?

Chikorita: WE? This is your fanfic; YOU find the characters. I'm out of here. *walks off*

Emerald Milotic: What do I do now?

Strange voice: Sorry, I can't answer that. You turned me off.

Emerald Milotic: Then STAY off. And I wasn't talking to you.

Strange voice: Weirdo. That's the first sign of madness; talking to yourself.

Emerald Milotic: *throws shoe at the strange voice*

Strange voice: You've lost your shoe.

Emerald Milotic: No I haven't. I just found it around here.

Misty: What happened to my shoe?

Emerald Milotic: Yay! I've found another character! *jumps around*

Misty: Whatever. Can I have my shoe back?

Strange voice: Here you go. *throws shoe to Misty*

Emerald Milotic: Wait... How can a strange voice throw a shoe?

Strange voice: *shrugs*

Emerald Milotic: How can a strange voice shrug?

Strange voice: No idea.

Emerald Milotic: How can a strange voice say 'No idea'?

Strange voice: Because I'm a voice, you idiot! Voices talk!

Emerald Milotic: They do? *looks suprised*

Misty: You're the weirdest Milotic I've ever seen.

Emerald Milotic: Is that a compliment?

Misty: Hey, you're a water type! I've got to catch you!

Emerald Milotic: WHAT!? This is my fic, and you're just a character. You can't just catch the author!

Misty: Yes I can.

Emerald Milotic: No you can't.

Misty: I can.

Emerald Milotic: Can't.

Misty: Can.

Emerald Milotic: Can't.

Misty: Can't.

Emerald Milotic: Can.

Misty: OK then; I win!

Emerald Milotic: What were we arguing about again?

Misty: *shrugs*

Emerald Milotic: There's too much shrugging in this fanfic.

Misty: What's a fanfic?

Emerald Milotic: Oh boy...

Misty: Hey, I'll catch you!

Emerald Milotic: No you can't.

Misty: I can.

Emerald Milotic: Can't.

Misty: Can.

Emerald Milotic: Can't. Hey- doesn't this sound familiar?

Misty: Probably... But I'll catch you now! Go Togepi!

Togepi: Prriiii!

Emerald Milotic: *prods Togepi*

Togepi: *falls over* Wah!!!!!!

Misty: Um... Go Pikachu!

Emerald Milotic: How come you have Pikachu?

Misty: It was Ash's engagement present to me.

Ash: But I got your mallet, Misty!

Emerald Milotic: Hey... can I borrow that please?

Ash: I suppose...

Emerald Milotic: *hits Pikachu over the head with mallet*

Pikachu: Hey... *rubs head*

Emerald Milotic: *bouncing mallet up and down repeatedly on Pikachu's head* I think this mallet's broken...

Pikachu: *zaps Misty*

Misty: ~*fried*~ Not me, you idiot!

Pikachu: Sorry Misty...

Misty: I'm not Misty.

Pikachu: ?

Emerald Milotic: ?

Ash: ?

Togepi: Why am I last to say "?"?

Emerald Milotic: Because you're the least important.

Togepi: Waaahhh!

Misty: Ah hem!

Togepi: Sorry... why aren't you Misty?

Misty: *unzips costume*

Emerald Milotic: Not you again!

Chikorita: Ta da! I'm thinking of setting up my own act! What do you think?

Pikachu: I think that you're really annoying.

Chikorita: Who asked you?

Pikachu: What happened to Misty anyway?

Chikorita: *~burp~*

Emerald Milotic: *falls over* Not again...

Pikachu: *claps*

Chikorita: I'm STILL really hungry...

Ash: RUN FOR IT!!!

Pikachu: Way ahead of you... ARGH!

Chikorita: *closes in on Emerald Milotic, licks lips*

Emerald Milotic: Er... I just remembered that... I have an appointment with... that tree! *runs off*

Chikorita: Why does everyone run away from me?

Bulbasaur's ghost: Because you're a ruthless- yet hungry- er... pokemon!

Chikorita: What are you doing here?

Bulbasaur's ghost: I don't know. I'm just an eat-and-run victim!

Chickorita: But what are you doing?

Bulbasaur's ghost: Haunting you! Whoo-ooo-ooo!

*~Meanwhile~*

Emerald Milotic: I've got to get out of this forest!

Pikachu: Over there! An exit!

Emerald Milotic: What are you doing here?

Pikachu: I'm the most popular pokemon!

Emerald Milotic: Er... no you're not. After conducting a survey you were found to be the LEAST popular pokemon.

Pikachu: What? Who won the competion?

Emerald Milotic: *pointing over there somewhere* Him.

Ninetails: Me?

Emerald Milotic: No, you're a her.

Ninetails: Oops ^-^

Emerald Milotic: *rolls eyes*

Ninetails: *rolls them back to her* Here, you might need these.

Emerald Milotic: Thanks! ^-^

Pikachu: Argh! Who is the most popular pokemon?

Emerald Milotic: This one. *drags Tyranitar in front of Pikachu*

Pikachu: *clenches fists and jumps around* You want a piece of me?

Tyranitar: *throws Pikachu against the wall*

Pikachu: owww....

Emerald Milotic: Stop complaining in lower case letters.

Pikachu: OWWWWWW!!!

Emerald Milotic: Not so loud!

Pidgeotto: Whassup over here?

Tyranitar: Well, I have a feeling something interesting is about to happen...

Pikachu: *vanishes*

Tyranitar: See.

Emerald Milotic: Where'd he go, Tyranitar?

Tyranitar: I'm not Tyranitar.

Ninetails: ?

Pidgeotto: ?

Emerald Milotic: Oh boy...

Tyranitar: *unzips costume* Ta da!

Pidgeotto: What's your problem?

Chikorita: *looking hurt* Don't you like my act?

Emerald Milotic: It's just getting a little boring.

Ninetails: How many times has this happened?

Emerald Milotic: Err.... *counts on fingers* Three. In the same day!

Pidgeotto: Where's Tyranitar?

Chikorita: ~*burp*~

Ninetails: You ATE him?

Chikorita: No, I just had a Big Mac meal with a milkshake. Tyranitar's over there somewhere, but I'll eat him sometime soon. By the way, Emerald Milotic, how was the appointment with the tree?

Emerald Milotic: Err... very woody... and I have the splinters to prove it.

Chikorita: -_-;;

Pidgeotto: WOW! How did you make that face?

Chikorita: What, this? -_-;; It's easy- you try it!

Pidgeotto: 0-o

Ninetails: o_-

Chikorita: No, that's not it. Try again.

Emerald Milotic: Oh boy... these people are crazy... -_-;;

Pidgeotto: That's IT!! That's amazing!

Emerald Milotic: I'll just leave you... to make faces at each other... *walks off*

Pikachu: Hi!!!

Emerald Milotic: I thought you disappeared.

Pikachu: I did... But I'm back! And we are going to spend a LOT of fun time together!

Emerald Milotic: *runs away*

Pikachu: :'o(

Random Rattata: Cool nose.

*~Meanwhile~*

Emerald Milotic: Phew, that was close.

Jigglypuff: Let's sing!

Emerald Milotic: Oh no...

Jigglypuff: Why didn't you say 'Oh boy'?

Emerald Milotic: I felt like a change. Look, you're not going to sing are you?

Jigglypuff: I can't sing, I'm not Jigglypuff.

Emerald Milotic: *looks up to the sky* Why me?

Jigglypuff: *unzips costume* Once again, I, Chikorita, pull off the stunt!

Emerald Milotic: Hey... isn't that a TV crew over there, looking for a stunt pokemon who... eats other pokemon?

Chikorita: *looks round* Where?

Emerald Milotic: *runs off*

Chikorita: Hey, there's no TV crew! Wait, Emerald Milotic, come back! *runs after her*

*~Meanwhile~*

Pidgeotto: I still haven't figured out how to do that face even though Chikorita left us with this talking guide.

Talking guide: *in a robotic voice* Lower your brow.

Ninetails: *lowers brow*

Pidgeotto: *lowers brow so low it falls off and hits the floor*

Emerald Milotic: *running up to them* HELP! Chikorita is after me!

Ninetails: But it's your fanfic, Emerald Milotic, just---

Emerald Milotic: I'm not Emerald Milotic.

Ninetails: ?

Pidgeotto: ?

Emerald Milotic: *unzips costume* Tell me I'm the greatest.

Ninetails: Nooooooo!

Pidgeotto: I still can't make that face...

Chikorita: *~burp~* I'm still hungry...

Ninetails: Then eat them! *points at you*

Chikorita: That is really lame... but OK!

(Note: If you are worried about what might happen next, please note that when Chikorita tried to jump out of my computer screen, he banged his nose on it. So you should be safe, unless he gets out his little sledgehammer. And please review this fic!)