~Divided and Confused~
Chapter Five
by cultnirvana
Brock walked into the room, where Ash lay on his back upon his bed.
Ash was confused after talking to and spending time with Misty the night before,
wondering why he was beginning to think about her in that way and did he really
feel something for her. He hadn’t heard his friend enter the room.
Trying not to startle Ash, he spoke. I’m about to start dinner. What are
you in the mood for?”
His friend didn’t move, but answered quietly back. I’m not really that
hungry.”
Brock understood why he was not, and decided to let Ash know that. He couldn’t
let him lay in here all day, trying to figure this out. I can understand
why.”
That got Ash’s attention. He sat up on the bed and for the first time looked
towards Brock. What do you mean?”
I’ve had my share of girl problems too. I guess you could call me an expert.”
How did you know?”
I’ve noticed the way you’ve been behaving lately. I recognize the signs.
Your in love.”
Shhh. Someone might hear you.”
Brock now knew he was right and with a smug look on his face he told Ash, Don’t
worry. Misty went out for a few messages. That’s why I took this opportunity
to talk to you. I thought you might need a little help.”
Help with what?”
Don’t pretend with me. I know what’s going on. You’ve started dating someone
who you are developing feelings for, but now, to mess everything up, there’s
someone else in the picture who you think you may have stronger feelings for.
The only problem is that this other girl happens to be your best friend." He
finished sarcastically, which just causes even more confusion.”
Ash sighed. Why do these things have to happen to me?”
Your a teenager, Ash, that’s why. No one survives their teenage years
without a few hiccups along the way. If you didn’t have the problems, you would
not be able to survive when your an adult. It’s all a part of life, and it makes
the good times even better.”
Well, I can’t wait to become an adult if I have another six years off
this to come.”
You’re just going to have to.” Brock let out a small laugh.
Ash, a little angrily, said Hey, don’t laugh. I feel bad enough already.”
God, am I glad I’m no longer a teenager.”
Well, I am and I need some help to sort this out.”
All I can do is give you some advice, a little help. Then you’ll have
to make the decisions yourself. If I made them for you, you’d be cheating life.
So tell me, what’s going on in that brain of yours?”
Well, at the beginning of this week, everything was going great. I was
having the best time with Stasi. She's so fun and I’m really happy when I’m
with her, plus she really likes me too.
" But then, for the past few days, I’ve been realizing how great my friendship
with Misty has become. We rarely argue now, and when we begin to, it stops quickly,
and we have been confiding in each other much more than ever, telling each other
deeply personal stuff. We went out and sat up quite late last night, just chatting
about anything on our minds, and I can't remember when I'd been so happy. She’s
very beautiful, too. I’ve always had a bit of a crush on her, but lately it
has become something more ... intense.”
It seems like you would much rather be with Misty than Stasi.”
Yeah, but I’m not sure why these feelings are creeping up now. I know
that being with her is not possible.”
What do you mean not possible?”
Come on, Brock, you know. Me and Misty have been friends for four years
now. We’re too close for anything to happen, and I don’t want to damage our
friendship, especially as we have become so close. Anyway, I don’t think she
notices I exist in that way. She usually goes for older guys, the intellectual
type, who are tall and strong. I’m not overly tall and I’m not that strong.
I’m sure she doesn’t feel for me the way I do for her.”
This put Brock in an awkward position. He knew that Misty did indeed have feelings
for Ash, and, in fact, that she was in love with him, but if he told him, he
would be intervening much more than he wished to. He hoped that the two would
come together without any outside stimuli. He didn’t want to force anything.
But with their feelings for each other, Brock was sure that eventually something
would happen for them to come together.
You’re her closest friend, that means you’re half-way home.”
But that is the main problem. If I tell her how I feel, I could possibly
lose that friendship and it means too much to me to jeopardize it. But I still
have feelings for her, and no matter what I do, they’ll never go away. I have
to stop denying them and pretending it’s something else.”
Well then, you have to decide between your options. You could travel the
safe road with Stasi, someone who does make you happy and who has feelings for
you. Or, you could take a chance, and risk something dear. If you asked Misty
out, there could be one of two outcomes; she has no feelings for you and perhaps
your friendship will decay a little, or maybe she feels for you the same way
you do for her. The friendship you value so dearly will evolve to the next level,
and you will have achieved one of your dreams.
"So is it safety; a fun relationship with a girl who you know cares about
you? Or will you take a chance; will you risk what you already have for something
that would become better than anything else possibly could? The more risk there
is in things, the more you get back, but at the same time there is more to lose.”
I don’t know. I’m all mixed up. I don’t have as strong feelings for Stasi
as I do for Misty, but at the same time I love Misty so much that I'm not prepared
to do anything that could end what we already have for some romantic fantasy
of what could be." Ash grabbed the sides of his head. Argh, I hate this.”
I know you do. But you have to make your decision quickly. You can’t kept
trailing Stasi around if you still have those doubts in your head. It’s not
fair to her. If you hesitate and then decide to tell Misty how you feel, you’ll
break Stasi’s heart. Whatever you do, you need to do it now before things get
too serious with her.” He paused for a minute before beginning again. Do
you want me to leave you alone a little while to think?”
No,” Ash replied, but then he just sat there for a moment on the bed,
staring into space. Brock could see he was trying to figure out what to do.
I don’t think I can risk it. Misty means too much to me. It’s hard but
I have to face the fact that I can never be with her.”
At that moment Misty came back into the apartment. Seeing no one about, she
came into the bedroom. Hi, guys.” She saw the seriousness on their faces,
something that was quite rare for them two. What’s wrong? Is everything
alright?”
Brock answered. Don’t worry. We were just talking.”
Mano O mano, I suppose.”
I guess,” Ash said, with a sadness in his eyes as he looked at her beautiful
face.
Misty handed the bag she had been carrying to Brock. I got all the messages.
So what are you going to make?”
I’ve still to figure that out. You can help me.”
Okay.” She walked out of the room leaving the guys alone again.
Brock looked up to Ash again, and said, with a little regret, You’ve really
grown up lately. That was a very hard decision to make.” Brock smiled at his
friend, then left the room and followed Misty to the kitchen.
Ash lay back down on his bed and just stared at the blank ceiling. He knew he
had made the right choice, the only problem was that the riskier path, if everything
turned out for the best, would have been so much better.
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