Bob was an
ordinary little kid. You know, slept in, woke up late, went to the
lab, where for some reason Professor Tree had given away the last
Pokemon two seconds before he got there, and he had just HAD to get
an Eevee, because, as his luck would have it, it was the last Pokemon
left in the lab, even though that left Prof Tree without anything to
study.
But that doesn't matter, because Pokemon Profs aren't
there for studying Pokemon. They're just there to hand out Pokemon to
late little boys who run to their labs in their Pikachu jammies
because they slept in. However, the late little boys have to have
dreams of becoming a Pokemon master.
That, or they're
narcissistic little buggers with a mental disorder, who always have
to put people down, and for some reason pick a type that has an
advantage over the Pokemon Master wannabe's Pokemon. Yet, somehow,
because the Pokemon Master kids are pure of spirit and mind, despite
being an orphan whose late parents drank too much and beat him
incessantly—they always win, and the narcissists always swear
revenge and end up joining Team Rocket, and generally make a nuisance
of themselves.
And yet somehow Mr. Pikachu Jammies Smith is
the only one that can stop them.
That's where Bob “Pikachu
Jammies (PJ)” Smith comes in. Mr. Vinnie “Nasty Little
Bugger (NLB)” Jones who, as everyone knows, has a mental
disorder (MD) making him REALLY mean, has been plotting to capture
the Legendaries. Everyone knows that the Legendaries bring balance to
the world's elements, and if they were ever captured, chaos would
reign supreme. If that weren't bad enough, Mewtwo had gone on a
rampage and had ravaged the countryside.
PJ Smith was the
world's last hope.
Five minutes after leaving home, NLB Jones
MD became the head of Team Rocket (despite having wet the bed earlier
that morning), and was closing in on the Legendaries.
Knowing
that they had no other recourse, the Unown approached PJ Smith and
offered him a deal. If he could capture the Legendaries and defeat
NLB Jones MD, who had, in the five minutes, raised a huge army of
extremely powerful Pokemon, he could keep the Legendaries so that he
could be the most powerful Pokemon trainer ever.
After a great
deal of thought (PJ IS, after all, pure of heart and would NEVER
capture a Legendary), PJ agreed, and, with a ton of Master Balls he
managed to find in his other pants, he caught all the Legendaries,
who are brainless idiots without him.
PJ engaged NLB, but NLB
had a secret weapon, not including the alien armada in space that's
meant for something further on that we don't know about.
Mewtwo
wasn't really on a rampage. He was taking orders from NLB. Mewtwo
started killing the Legendaries and, imbued by power from the Unown,
PJ took the Red Orb and the Blue orb and fused them into a single
orb, making himself into a Pokemon unlike any the world had ever
known.
With his newfound powers, PJ sent NLB and Mewtwo into
space, hurtling towards the uber alien fleet that we don't know
about.
But the power was too much for PJ, and he died because
he had spent too much energy. In his last breaths, he brought peace
to the Pokemon world, and nobody fought anybody ever again. It was a
dandy, happy, Super, Bradyiffic place to live.
And then the
aliens came and wiped out all life on the planet.
Ash_Junior
looked up from writing his masterpiece and grinned. "Now they
will have to vote me as teh r0xx0r l331 k1|/|g!" he
crowed.
Then he spotted the angry crowd of reviewers
coming.
He had just enough time to say "Oh Crap!"
before they stoned him to death for writing such a terrible fic.
The
REAL End Ending